Am I arrogant? [Johari Window]
Ooooo yet another controversy heading!!!!! This time I'll make sure I address the title by the time I'm finishing this post as my better half felt that in my last post I should have given more info inside the for that title. Between Session -4 and Session -5 we have been asked to do a exercise [Johari Window] as a group exercise, the catch here is it has to be done with the group who knows each other to make the exercise effective.
Unfortunately, we did not have much options left other than going with one of the group that we have been part of for the sake of assignments in Q1 of the course. Our group in Q1 was so professional and discipline in nature we check-in on time for the meetings and check-out from the meetings with no chit-chat (ஆமா நாங்க ரொம்ப ஸ்ட்ரிக்ட் officers). When we started we ourself asked a question how effective this would be but eventually we did it and completed hardly in 45 - 50 minutes. As part of the exercise we need to figure out how we see perceive ourself and how others perceive me (கொஞ்சம் இக்கட்டான விஷயம் தான்) but all for good. As Prof Viji, tells us there are no right or wrong let's do it what we know and we did it. Whenever she says "there is no right........" I will definitely get a flash of
Coming back to Johari window, to make our lives easier one among us have came up with a list of adjectives and we need to write down for ourself and for others in the group once, we have put it down we will share it with others. Almost all in my team have unanimously said me as Extrovert, even in the class when we did MBIT I was the first Extrovert to come fwd for the discussion so there is no doubt about it. But, there was one particular adjective which was straight forward you know what it could be? if you're smart you guessed it right it was little arrogant 😏.
Am I arrogant? this is one of the question for which I'm trying to get answer for myself for a long time. All that I know is I'm straight-forward, authentic, open book but, when I feel something is suppressing me then I'll be not diplomatic be it to a professor in class, to my boss in office, to my relative or in a friends group. I might show arrogance but, the path that would have lead to it would have been rough to a certain extent. And that was the purpose of Johari Window assignment and I have got a fruitful result from it How I perceive myself and how others see me 😀.
I also happen to understand thin difference between confident and arrogant on looking into this picture.
Session -5
In 5th session as usual Prof Viji, started with high energy (அப் அப்ப I have a doubt was that the energy or was that synergy, be it a energy or synergy it's good for us). In this session I was so impressed in two important aspects authenticity and predictability. Let me go with the topic in which I was the odd one out among the group. Viji, had raise a question "Would you like to work with predictable or unpredictable colleague?" Most of us have preferred with predictable and I stood out from others by going with unpredictable colleague😂.
You may ask seriously?
Yes, I would prefer to work with an unpredictable colleague though I'm used to or comfortable working with predictable ones. Even in last Monday, Kalyan (my manager) in his directs meeting he was listing a number of things and we all were in listening mode and for a while there was a silence and I broke it with "Kalyan, can I ask you a question here?" with no second thoughts he replied I would have been surprised if you don't come up with a question here. A similar incident has happened when I was speaking with my directs and in fact they know, what I would be asking/saying😂. With this much understanding at my work place why did I prefer to choose other option spontaneously? Because, of the factors I felt a predictable colleague:
- will set high expectations from high performing resource
- will lead stereotype average and below average resources
- no kick in working with folks who knows what would be the next actions / decisions
- may lead to take it for granted, something "like you know what would be next go ahead", "you would have already executed it, why inform me?"
When one of the factor slightly slips aways there might be some disruption in harmony that has been established in work environment. In a professional environment when you set expectations and if it's not meet it leads to disappointment so, I went for the option of unpredictable colleague. I also saw/enjoyed the +ve sides of working with an predictable colleague but my core felt due to my predictable nature there might be some kind of fabrication with the information that could come to my sight/preview. It's because we're social animal and when we know what could be the consequence of this we try not to choose or go by the natural way. For some reasons this dialogue from movie Ramana flashed me when I'm writing:
Will I rethink on my decision? May be, but as of now I'll stick with my arrogance😷.
Authenticity:
I'm always proud to say that I'm authentic in nature, one of the best trait that pose. Sugarcoating (even being diplomatic) is the last resort which I hate from the core. But, in real world diplomacy is essential, sometimes I have felt why is this diplomacy is at this supremacy? (might be because it's not my cup of boost then now, coffee) All I have realised is being authentic is not rude, it depends on the person to whom you're authentic and to get things like an icing in the cake we have to be diplomatically authentic. To my knowledge I have not been diplomatic (folks reporting to me are romba pavam), now on let me try to consciously add Manae Thenay etc and make sure I don't hurt anyone who is not aware of me.